Driving

My 15th birthday was yesterday, and this means driving. The day we’ve all dreaded has come. My dad picked up the driving manual for me, and I’ve slowly had the patients to read 30 pages of it. EW. Now, I’m actually terrified. My mom had to trick me into having my first driving lesson because I didn’t want to. She told me we were going home, and then pulled into a parking lot. She turned the car off and parked it, then forced me into the drivers seat. Now, it’s not that I don’t want to drive, it’s that I’m too afraid of crashing into things.

I turned the car on and my mother patiently told me what to do. I stayed at 5 mph the entire time, which is basically letting the car roll. I was too scared to go any faster. When I realized I was going 8 mph I tried to slow down.

There was a inevitable turn in this parking lot, and I didn’t understand how I was supposed to gas/ break, steer, and turn my blinker on all at the same time… Every time I didn’t know what to do I put the brakes on, and I had no idea how hard to press down on the gas or brake. This resulted in a lot of jolting. My poor dog was flying around in the back seat. I also have laugh attacks when I’m nervous. Throughout the entire experience of driving in circles I put the brakes on randomly and had a laugh attack. Very entertaining for my mom.

Next came parking. Once I was smoothly able to put my blinker on, and turn I tried to park. I tried 5 times, and each time I was as crooked as I could possibly be.  I was great at the whole reverse backing up part, but I wasn’t able to stay in the lines when I pulled in. I parked half the car in a field multiple times. Oops. See ya on the road soon (;

Show People

The art of singing show tunes, and what show people really do in rehearsal. Here’s a link to a show tune you should listen to while reading this blog post: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JCcbnVNw950

Maybe you’re familiar with that one friend who does silly things in public, or the person who breaks out in songs that obviously aren’t pop, or maybe you know someone who spends most minutes in rehearsal. This is a show person, and you should either run far far way because their knowledge of how to be hyper is extensive, or you could choose to embrace it and then later think, “Oh my great goodness, why am I up at 4am listening to this person, who I thought was my friend, belting show tunes and doing corresponding dance numbers?” Either way, you’ve definitely met a show person.

I know non show people are quite curious about what actually happens inside of rehearsals: well let me in on a little secret, we don’t actually rehearse. No sir, that would be silly, instead we climb into the ugliest party clothes we own and pump music through the speakers, and we have a huge dance party. There are snacks and refreshments too. Now you’re probably asking, “if they don’t rehearse, then how are the shows so good?” Well, to be a show person you need to be born with all of the scripts ever written stuffed in your head, this includes scripts that haven’t been written.

Now, here is a nifty little list to identify a show person, you should print it out and carry it around with you:

  • Listens to show tunes just because they like to
  • Has multiple pairs of character, tap, and jazz shoes
  • Owns too many binders stuffed with miscellaneous sheet music
  • Drinks emergency and tea the week of a show, or in the whole rehearsal process
  • Likes to watch musicals
  • Knows how to do stage hair/ makeup, even if they are male
  • Loves pizza, because it is their fuel post rehearsal
  • Is lacking sleep due to a show the previous night

In short, look for the exhausted person wandering the halls, running into walls faintly singing a song, with smeared makeup all over their face, and stiff hair sprayed hair that could quite possibly be sticking up in all directions.

BONUS!

Here’s a small bonus section, I know you’re curious about backstage shenanigans. Here’s the quick run down. The actors pass around a bottle of honey for their throat, they trash their dressing station, sneak food in costume ( I of course would never), and are wearing over 5 layers underneath their costume. Not to mention they take tons of pictures in costume, just for street cred on Instagram.

Now, that show tune link I told you to listen to while reading this could possibly be ending, and if it’s not you should listen to the rest of it. I hope I got you hooked on show tunes (; AND IF YOU DIDN’T CLICK THE LINK PLEASE KNOW I AM CRYING VERY HARD